What You're Made Of

When a chapter ends, there's a strong pull to jump straight to options. Should I consult, write, sit on a board, retrain? It feels productive. It's usually premature.

You can't choose well among options until you know what you're made of — and most people carry decades of raw material they've never once laid out. This deeper read is about the three things that material is made of, and why we habitually count only one of them.

The three materials

Experience, strengths, values

The workshop breaks “what you're made of” into three things — and the mistake almost everyone makes is to inventory only the first, and only the version of it that fits on a CV.

What the raw material is made of

Three layers, not one

01 · Experience

What you've actually done

In verbs, not titles. Not “Head of Finance” but “turned around a failing division, calmed a frightened team.” Titles are containers; verbs are the contents — and the contents travel with you.

02 · Strengths

What makes you feel strong

Not simply what you're good at. A strength draws energy rather than draining it. You can be highly competent at something that quietly depletes you.

03 · Values

What actually matters now

Often not what mattered at thirty-five. Most of us can list values we admire; far fewer can name the two or three we won't compromise.

The sharp line

A strength is not a talent

The careers researcher Marcus Buckingham draws a line here that changes everything. A strength, he argues, isn't just an activity you're good at — it's one that makes you feel strong, that gives you energy rather than taking it. Something you're merely competent at, but which depletes you, is a talent, not a strength. And building a next chapter on a depleting talent is exactly how people end up successful and hollow.

The distinction that matters most

Good at it vs strengthened by it

A talent

“I'm good at it — and it drains me.”

Real competence, admired by others, quietly depleting. The world will keep asking you for more of it.

A strength

“I'm good at it — and it fills me up.”

Competence that gives energy back. This is the raw material to build the next decade on.

Same quality of output; opposite effect on you. For the first time, that difference gets a vote.

Pause

Name one thing you're known for being good at and quietly dread. That's a talent, not a strength — and you've earned the right to stop building on it.

Values

Naming the two or three

Brené Brown's work on living into your values makes the uncomfortable point: most of us can list ten values we admire, but far fewer can name the two or three we would not compromise — and fewer still actually behave in line with them. Naming them is the work. Options chosen without them tend to be echoes of the old job: the same work, slightly smaller. Options chosen from your real experience, strengths and values tend to surprise you, in a good way.

What this can mean for you

Inventory the material before the options. Lay out experience, strengths and values first. Choosing well is impossible until you have.

Separate strengths from talents. Ask not just “am I good at this?” but “does it give energy or take it?” Build on the ones that give.

Name the two or three values you won't compromise. Then check your options against them. That's how people end up doing something at sixty they'd never have predicted at fifty.

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Your CV is a list of roles. What you're made of runs deeper — and it comes with you when the title doesn't.

The through-line

Go further

The research behind this

1970

Richard N. Bolles — What Color Is Your Parachute?The enduring classic on identifying transferable skills and carrying them across a career change. Updated almost every year for a reason.

2001

Marcus Buckingham & Donald Clifton — Now, Discover Your StrengthsThe book that reframed strengths as energy, not just competence — with a language for naming yours.

2018

Brené Brown — Dare to LeadPractical on clarifying the handful of values you'll actually stand on.

The companion workshop

Haven't done it yet? The short workshop turns this into a 15-minute exercise, with a printable Raw Material worksheet.

Do the workshop →